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Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Just a message I received, and my response. Maybe I did good, maybe not. Thoughts? Advice?


HIM:
It has been over two wks since we concluded the transaction and I still do not have your item..suggest you become more involved in customer relations as this performance is the very worst I have experienced in ten years of EBay...not a happy customer !


ME 1:
Thanks for your info, I will be more diligent.

this is the first I have heard of a problem. I will check on the tracking status when I log in. I assume you have already checked it. I will check on the timelines of your purchase, when it was shipped, adn anything else I can find.

Sorry this has been such a bad experience. Once I deliver a package to the post office I rarely follow up on it as it makes its way through to the destination. But I always intensely follow up once a problem arises.


ME 2 (follow up 20 minutes later:
It has been 11 days since you bought it on a Saturday. We are closed over the weekend, so it has been 9 days since we received your order. It was shipped the same day Monday the 20th.

It took one day to depart Florida toward you as you can see below.

I will call the Allen Park MI postal center tomorrow and see if I can get an answer on what happened once it got to Michigan. You might make more headway though since you are their local customer and they answer more to you than to me. I can never get a straight answer from the post office unless it is my local one I am talking to. Most of them are good workers I suppose, but enough of them are sorry or lazy or just don't care. Or all of those.

They will jut blow me off but you can see the status below that it was delayed. You do what you want to do, but I would get in touch with the highest supervisor I could find and DEMAND an explanation. (Might double-check your address to make sure it is correct though....sometimes people fatfinger their address).

I am always open to suggestions. If there is something you think I can do better I am certainly open to giving it a shot. I got your ****** out within 4 hours of coming to work on Monday. If I spend a lot of time following up on how far along a package is enroute to a destination that leaves a lot less time to process orders and get items out quickly. I hope this hasn't been too much of an inconvenience to you. One thing I will do for sure it to add in a note with all listings that orders placed on weekends will not be processed until the following Monday.

I will follow up every day and send you an update.

Here is the tracking status as of the last update:

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Talk to me in that condescending tone and I am going to zap you.

Gist of what you said has merit, delivery suxked.

Sugar and honey get results NOT vinegar.

Sarcasm is for the coup de grace not the start of the engagement..

:boink:

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Well...you act like a spoiled baby and you get overwhelmed with info in the hopes that the "customer service" arguement falls apart. Later I sent him his local post office phone number to "save him the trouble of looking it up".

What you dont see is that the thing made it out of my regional PO in only 3 days (First Class Mail) and took 6 days on the slow truck. Then his locals f'ed it up somehow. Don't you think a person would check his tracking info before firing off a nastygram like that? Worst customer service becasue I didn't watch his box from step to step to his door.......sheesh.

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

You are underestimating the IQ of a buyer. Buyer has not expectation of anything but their demands to you giving resolution.

You feed him ammo to put you down.... never tell them you paid no attention to their completed sale. The buyer(s) need to think they are in your wet dreams...

You have to sell them the concept they are the most important thing.....

Is that galling? Darn right. But if it means gold stars for communication then it is needed.

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

oh.....but you probably would not have sent that message as a first salvo either......

His message was one for about 3 days from now when I did not answer him or told him to go check his tracking.

Yeah....there is condescension in my message but he is probably a hothead or just dumb and probably thinks I really give a s&*t about his problem. Nothing I can do once the mailman gets it so I don't dwell on their delays unless someone needs a hand held. (All First Class Postage)

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Brilliant!

Couldn't said it better myself

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

I hear all that. But I also smell the chances of DSRs being dinged. :pout:

Your aim is to pretend, and chuck up in the bucket as you do so....

;)

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Just a message I received, and my response. Maybe I did good, maybe not. Thoughts? Advice?


HIM:
It has been over two wks since we concluded the transaction and I still do not have your item..suggest you become more involved in customer relations as this performance is the very worst I have experienced in ten years of EBay...not a happy customer !


ME 1:
Thanks for your message.
this is the first I have heard of a problem. I will check on the tracking status when I log in. I will check on the timelines of your purchase, when it was shipped, adn anything else I can find.

Sorry this has been such a bad experience. My practice is to endeavor to keep issues with my valued customers at a minimum.


ME 2 (follow up 20 minutes later:
It has been 11 days since you bought it on a Saturday. Since shipping is not put thro' the local post office until Monday, there is a delay on their part.



I will call the Allen Park MI postal center tomorrow and see if I can get an answer on what happened once it got to Michigan. To also help you with any enquiries you may wish to make here is the local number of what I gather would be the closest post office to the address I have on file.

I am preturbed at this untimely delay as it impacts on how I like to treat my customers. I will work towards resolution.

I will follow up every day and send you an update.

I have enclosed the tracking status as of the last update:

LITS.


GB version: the message will be tacked to the dart board & darts thrown at it.
Buyer will not know I am peeved ;)

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Let me say upfront....I am not saying I am right.

There....

Now....my track record is pretty good since going stealth with about 2000 transactions, 14 accounts, all 100% positive and all accounts either Bronze or Above Standard. I guess all of my accounts can stand a hit or two in ratings if they happen to come along either justifiably or through my own actions.

Sometimes I just like to punch a guy that pokes me a little harder than necessary.

What do you think about this response:

"Hi,

I can tell you are upset by this transaction and I am sorry it hasn't worked out the way you expect. I am afraid I must have missed a message from you about the package not arriving. I will check through my spam folders and all and see what happened. I take customer service very seriously and hate that I did not take care of this when you first checked.

Believe me, if I had known there was a problem I would have jumped on it HARD and never let it get to this point. Give me a hour and I will pass along everything I can find. In the meantime, if there is anything you can think of that I can do to get this right please let me know."


..............

There, now he can see he came across like a hysterical bee-atch when he was dealing with someone who is willing to go above-and-beyond.

or

he is just a cyber-bully.

He ain't my first rodeo with a jerk. That is why ebay has standards that are below perfection....because some people are just too dumb to understand shipping, etc etc.

But hey....he has been on ebay for 10 years (he can't even add...it has been 13 years, and never had a package take more than 14 days (acutally 11 days....did I mention he can't add?)

Thanks for being a sounding board.

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

haha roflmao :FF:

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

well....I guess I WOULD like to f*&^ him......up.

Some people are just in need of a moment of Alpha Male. But my product isn't usualy something a person buys unless he has made a little bit of a mark. And I don't mean in his tighty whiteys.

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

I have to agree with GreenBean on this one.

No matter how angry and upset you are at the way a buyer speaks to you, you have to be less aggressive in your responses as it will come back to bite you.

The buyer is upset and has a right to be since he bought an item from you 11 days ago, and he still has not got it. So of course he is upset.
You cannot be angry at him for being upset about it, so rather than starting a war of words your should really show the buyer that you are concerned and will look into the matter for him.
You will even earn a positive rating out of it, rather than guarantee a negative one.

You should also be grateful as some people dont even bother contacting you, they just open cases.

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Doesn't a buyer has an obligation to take a look at the tracking before firing off a letter like that? Wouldn't a reasonable person?

Yeah yeah....cut my nose off to spite my face. I guess that comes with being comfortable with my situation. Ship an item 4 hours after the order.....and accept that there is one in every bunch, can't avoid the unreasonable customer that wants to vent on someone because he is powerless to make the post office deliver any faster than they will.

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

You're the buyer's bitch, dude. Why should they check tracking when you're there to do it for them?

I get mine emailing and asking, "Where's my package", and I find it was delivered an hour before and is in the mailbox.

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Literally an every day occurrence for me. What's even worse is it's mostly cheap bast@rds spending less than $20 in my stores acting like I should have loaded up a private jet and flown it directly to their house within 24 hours.

On top of all this, I send 2 emails with tracking information once the sale and shipping has been completed. Somehow, email no longer works for these people. But, they sure expect me to respond to their harassing emails instantaneously.

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Canceling my order, I will be leaving negative feedback as well!

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Instead of emailing, you should hop on your private jet and give them a face to face explanation.

I am just happy that everyone else seems to have bigger gaping asshats than what I have to deal with.

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

When I do have these problems, I always try to be the victim along with them. Like "yeah, I do not know what USPS's problem is usually they are pretty good at delivering but sometimes they have their moments. Let me check with my local branch and see what they can dig up. I will message you back tomorrow, and I am sorry for this inconvenience. Hopefully you can see where I had delivered it the next day and it was accepted by USPS.

Thank you
Your Friendly Ass Kisser :)"

Something like that

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Oh yea...you know all those USPS delays are still going crazy. Just adding to the sh*t storm of negs.

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Still getting the 3-5 day delays where it shows it's just sitting in my city doing nothing. So, of course, it looks like I just sat on it. How are you not having this problem?

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

Yeah, and the funny part is that the customer can see when you shipped it but because the Post Office just sits on it, makes you look bad.

Re: Get a load of this jerk (and how I handled it)
 

USPS has been sucking lately. I politely shift blame onto the USPS while pretending to give a f*ck to the customer.

It sucks taking crap from customers online. I don't know how reps that work at retail stores handle it in person. I'd lose it.