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  #1  
Old 03-01-2009
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Talking Broken Fence (FunnY)

My Sister emailed me this joke and I thought it was funny.


- Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Minnesota.

All three go with a White House official to examine the fence.

The Minnesota contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. "Well," he says, "I figure the job will run about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me."
The Tennessee contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "I can do this job for $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me."

The Chicago contractor doesn't measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, "$2,700."

The official, incredulous, says, "You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure?"

The Chicago contractor whispers back, "$1000 for me, $1000 for you, and we hire the guy from Tennessee to fix the fence."

"Done!" replies the government official.

And that, my friends, is how the new stimulus plan will work. -

BooMer
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Old 03-01-2009
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Lol... nice..
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Old 03-01-2009
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Works for me.... LOL
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Old 03-01-2009
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Young Chuck moved to Texas and bought a Donkey from a farmer for $100.
The farmer agreed to deliver the Donkey the next day.

The next day he drove up and said, 'Sorry son, but I have some bad
news, your donkey died.'

Chuck replied, 'Well, then just give me my money back.'

The farmer said, 'Can't do that. I went and spent it already.'

Chuck said,'Ok, then, just bring me the dead donkey.'

The farmer asked, 'What ya gonna do with him?'

Chuck said, 'I'm going to raffle him off.'The farmer said: 'You can't
raffle off a dead donkey!'

Chuck said, 'Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he's
dead.'

A month later, the farmer met up with Chuck and asked, 'What happened with
that dead donkey?'

Chuck said, 'I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars a
piece and made a profit of $898.'

The farmer said, 'Didn't anyone complain?'

Chuck said, 'Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars
back.'

Chuck now works on Wall Street for Citigroup as a Senior Investment Consultant!
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Old 03-02-2009
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Quote:
Originally Posted by TheyGotMeToo View Post
Chuck said, 'I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars a
piece and made a profit of $898.'
That is a good one. But isn't 500 tickets X $2.00 equals $1000 minus the $2.00 that he refunded equals $998 profit?

I guess he wasn't in charge of accounting. LOL.

BooMer

Edit: Oh I forgot he put out $100 to buy the Donkey. Stupid me...

BooMer

Last edited by BooMer; 03-02-2009 at 08:01 AM.
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Old 03-02-2009
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Hehe.. donkey..

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